Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
