Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
