Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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