remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
PANTIES FOUND
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