what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
