Buhtt sex?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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