Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize