I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
