are you so shy because you have an std?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
