okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
