We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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