no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize