Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
