I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
