my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
