Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
