Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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