Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize