5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So vagazzling was a success
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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