C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
We left an ass print on the piano.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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