I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize