K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
