The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize