dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
