Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
He kissed a someone with a penis
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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