i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
