Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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