so explain again why im purple
no
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
