You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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