I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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