Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
