Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize