her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
