Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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