ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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