you turned your livingroom into a bong?
you have to choose: penises or morals?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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