we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize