Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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