Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
