I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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