you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
