I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Randomize
