she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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