That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize