mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
