oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
