hell yes lets make some ravioli
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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