Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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