isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize