Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
